Relationship Advice Help -
3 Marriage Tips
Marriage starts out great (usually!). We feel deeply in love,
and we plan to live happily ever after. When we first get
married, we are in what can be called the honeymoon phase of our
relationship. We feel close, intimate, loving and loved. This is a
powerful start to our life together.
However, given the divorce rate, the best of
plans do not always work out. So what can you do? How
can you make your marriage thrive? Following are some key
marriage tips that can help you do just that.
Here then is a powerful marriage tip. The honeymoon phase is just a
phase. It won't last. As good as it feels to spend all that time
together and snuggling and playing together, it won't last.
And this is perfectly okay.
At some point we will move into a second phase.
This can be called the Me/Us phase. This means that you are
paying attention to "us," the both of you as a couple, and "you,"
what you individually want and need in your own life.
In the Me/Us phase, we can and usually still do love our partner
strongly, but we also can focus on our other goals and aims in life.
We want to spend some time alone, or with our own friends. We start
to focus on work or our career. There is nothing wrong with this,
and one of the great marriage tips is to understand that this is
natural and normal.
Because we aren't taught about the phases in relationships, we can
end up with a lot of problems as we move into the me/us phase. "Why
is she so needy and clingy?" "Why is he becoming so distant?"
"Is something going wrong?" "Are we losing the love?"
These types of questions can turn into "you
don't love me anymore" type fights. Couples can split up just
because they don't understand this phase is natural and okay.
You've got to separate some and get on with your life. You
can't remain a clingy mess always wanting to spend every minute
So acknowledge this phase. Let it happen.
Talk to your mate about your interests and needs and plans.
Let him/her know what you are thinking and it can go much smoother.
Another great marriage tip can keep you happy over the years of
being together. And that tip is to play together. Make time to play.
Do not let the burdens and responsibilities of life stop you both
from playing together. We can get so tired from all the things we do
in life we don't take the time to enjoy each other.
Research has shown that couples who have regular date nights have
less conflict and report more marital happiness. So do take the time
and make the "effort" to play together. Plan time to get away from
all the burdens and responsibilities of your life and go have fun.
See a movie. Go for a hike. You will both be a lot happier and
healthier in your marriage as a result.
Another of the key marriage tips is to develop the skill of making
intimate requests of your mate. When you are upset and all mad about something they
do or don't do, make a request. If she interrupts you all the time and this bugs
you, make a request. "Would you let me finish before you talk?" If
you make a request rather than let things build up, your
relationship will prosper.
Your mate won't say yes to every request, but they will at least
know what you want and what you need. If you can learn the simple
skill of making complaints into asks, your marriage will be more
likely to thrive. If you don't do this, you will tend to nag or yell
at your mate, and this just damages things over time. You want
to avoid that damage!
We never got taught relationship
or marriage skills in school.
Spending a few minutes learning more relationship intelligence can pay
off with years of more love, deeper bonding and emotional connection.
Relationship advice can be simple and doesn't need to be hard to