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Relationship Advice - True Love Masks

We all are thrilled when we find a relationship and finally feel the stirrings of true love. It feels wonderful and we are very happy. But only for a while. Then some distance seems to grow between us and the feeling of true love starts to waver.

How do we keep true love thriving in our relationship over the long haul? How do we stop from losing that great feeling and maybe losing our mate?

There are lots of answers to questions of keeping true love. It is not a simple or one answer fits all type of issue.

One cut at learning to keep the true love you find is to take off your mask. Be real and genuine with your mate. You can't keep true love if you are inauthentic.

Now, of course, we all wear masks in our daily lives. One example of a mask is being a "good girl." You try to please your man, you try to avoid conflict, you focus on being a good follower and a helpful partner. Another type of mask could be "I don't need anybody, I'm strong and independent." You try to handle everything yourself and appear strong and invulnerable.

Such masks can get in the way in our love life. If you are a good girl all the time and don't take off that mask, you can get taken for granted and give all the time while receiving nothing. If you don't stand up for yourself you could get minimized.

Or if you are wearing the strong independent type mask you can end up shutting your partner out, and you need to let them in by being vulnerable and needing your mate from time to time.

The point is that whatever masks you wear, you will need to trust your mate and learn to take it off and be genuine with them. True love can't thrive if you are putting on a fake front and not being who you really are.

Here's an action step you can take today.  Look at your masks.  What are the top two or three you use in your life?  Helper?  Jokester?  Perfectionist?  Loner?  Bossy?  Independent?  See if you can begin to show other sides of yourself to your mate, as a first step.

If you would like to learn more, you can read about this and other skills in the book How To Have The Relationship You Want. 

Here are some links to other information that can be of help.