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Relationship Advice On Doubling Intimacy
We all get into relationships to feel more love
and intimacy. But we often don't know what to do to feel more love.
Are there some actions you can take to increase intimacy?
A great piece of relationship intelligence to discover and apply in
your love life is that yes, there are things you can actually do to
create the experience of love and intimacy. There are actions you
can take every day that will build more feelings of true love into
your relationship. By extension, if you are not taking these
actions, you may be missing out on or hurting your chances to build
the love between you as a couple.
So you don't have to sit around and wait and
wish and hope for more intimacy. You can take charge and make
intimacy happen in your relationship. This is powerful news.
There are lots of different powerful acts you can take to increase
love in your marriage. We'll talk about just one of these now, that
you can start using more of today: understanding. The act of
understanding.
If your mate says they are worried about an upcoming job interview,
they might look to you like they aren't that worried. They may look
like they are in control and unruffled. So you don't really discuss
their concern with them. But inside, they may be feeling very
afraid. If you blow them off and don't discuss their concerns, they
may feel like you don't really care about them and don't understand
them.
Here is some potent relationship advice: Feeling heard and
understood is a basic human intimacy need. Take time to make your
mate feel heard and understood and make sure you feel heard and
understood around any emotional issue and you will both feel more
love and intimacy. If they ask for more help with the kids and all
you do is shout out to them to "keep it down," your mate might not
feel very heard and understood.
How do you make your lover feel heard and understood? A simple way
is to repeat back what you heard. "So the kids are driving you crazy
and you want some help, right? What do you want me to take care of?"
Telling your partner what you heard and asking clarifying questions
will make them feel perfectly understood.
We all talk to our mates many times a day, but we don't necessarily
listen and understand each other all that often. Making sure you and
your mate feel heard and understood on any issue and it will pay off
in years of closer connection and feelings of intimacy.
This is a simple way to express true love. Listening and
understanding. There are many more, but this is a good
foundational practice.
Turn your true love into direct action, shine your light, and see
what a difference it makes in the world.
Actions Steps you can consider taking for this
insight:1. See if you can
practice committed listening with your mate for 5 to 10 minutes a day.
Make small talk and listen intently.
2. While doing so, from time to time feed
back what you are hearing from them "What I'm hearing you say is..."
3. See if you can impact your mate with
the power of making them feel heard and understood. We never got taught relationship skills in school.
Spending a few minutes learning more relationship intelligence can pay
off with years of more love, deeper bonding and emotional connection.
Relationship advice can be simple and doesn't need to be hard to
follow!
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