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Relationship Advice On Intimacy

Men need relationship advice on intimacy as much as women do.   One thing to remember when it comes to intimacy in relationships is this:  it really can help if your lover is also your best friend. Well, not your only best friend, but certainly one of the closest friends you have, given all the time you spend together.

How do you turn your mate into your best friend? You know a lot about this already. Just look at some of your best friend relationships now to see what makes them so valuable to you.  When it comes to relationship advice on intimacy, here are probably some common things that you'll find.

A first important quality of best friends is lack of criticism and judgment. You don't want to spend time with your mother if she's criticizing you, your mate doesn't want to spend time with you if you're criticizing them.

Another key piece of relationship advice on intimacy is listening. One of the things we like about our best friends in life is that they actually listen to us. They treat what we have to say as important. They aren't usually distracted and doing ten other things while they listen.

Take a moment and look at your relationship. How is the listening between the two of you? Do you feel that your lover drinks you in? Do you feel that you make them feel understood?  Listening creates intimacy!

An additional aspect of best friendship is the opposite of the last. Talking instead of listening. With best friends, we can talk about deeper things. We can share problems that we don't have all worked out. We tend to tell best friends what's really going on with us.

Also we can talk about our dreams and innermost desires with our best friends, since they won't ridicule us and make fun of us. So if we are thinking about taking up music lessons so we can start a band, we'll discuss that with them.  This is important to intimacy in relationships.

So you can have your mate be your best friend by working on these same areas. Be less critical and more accepting. Listen and make your mate feel heard and understood. Risk yourself and share some of your deeper dreams and hopes and encourage your mate to do the same. You may need to train your mate and yourself over time to do these things, but they will pay off. 

We never got taught relationship advice on intimacy in school.  Spending a few minutes learning more relationship intelligence can pay off with years of more love, deeper bonding and emotional connection.  Relationship advice on intimacy can be simple and doesn't need to be hard to follow!



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