Relationship Advice Help Book

You can read much of the book Train Your Mate - How To Have The Relationship You Want, here, to see if it is for you!

Train Your Mate - How To Have The Relationship You Want

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While these skills are great for survival, they are poor for developing intimacy!!!

Now understand, to boys this is sheer fun! It is some deep seated masculine-energy passion play. There is something glorious and magnificent that gets evoked by such "take on all comers" defiance. It is howling at the moon, it is braying an emotional strength, and it is a description of a level of masculine development and expression.

The thing to understand is that getting ganged up on, clawed at, dragged kicking and screaming aside is something that males can find delightful. Once again, there is nothing at all wrong with this universal boyhood pursuit. Boys need to learn about and get acquainted with their power. Masculine energy, which is thrusting, driving, focused and rigid must learn some boundaries, must learn how far it can push and where it must stop and cooperate or recede.

Such things are pleasant childhood play, but as we all know do not translate well to creating intimacy. There are too many relationships where women are getting smacked, forced (a form of "ganged up on") tackled, and dragged kicking and screaming into submission and fearful compliance.

The point, once again, is that boys are raised on such behaviors. It is "fun" for us to "play" games of domination and control. Competitive communication, rather than communication to connect and support and cooperate, becomes the unconscious masculine mode. We want to WIN. This masculine style of play - dominating and defending - becomes the masculine form of communication. The games boys are raised on become the foundation for what men do and the way they "are" in relationships.

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